K, so call this a rant, a vent/bitch session... Call it what you want. I call it me being frustrated and needing to talk.. I tend to do that a lot, don't I??
Once again this weekend, I heard about another marriage crumbling..
Big deal right? Marriages crumble every day...
The thing that is starting to get to me though, is the fact that so many of the marriages that are crumbling have 1 main common factor.
A factor that makes me shake my head and wonder what the hell is going on...
I know of at least 3 marriages (with this factor) that have crumbled this year. Why? I don't know. Typically (unless something like adultery or addictions) people don't discuss the cause of the breakup.. That by the way, is fine by me. The less I know, the better!!
The thing (factor) that I notice in all of these separations, is the fact that in each case, the wife has just lost a bunch of weight..
What is with that??
Obviously if a marriage crumbles, there are some huge issues.. Issues that none of us want or need to know about. That being said, I would still like to know the reason these women are leaving after they've lost a bunch of weight?
Again, I know that every situation is different and no one truly knows the ins and outs of a relationship but I can't help but think that these women are going to be very sorry in the future.
For the women that I know, I so badly wish that I could ask them what they are thinking..
These men have loved them though (literally) thick and thin. I've seen this with my own eyes. A couple of these men even met/married these girls when they were at their bigger weights..
Obviously these men love these women inside and out, for who they are, not what they look like.
I can't help but wonder if these women were with the men because they had no self confidence or esteem? Did they stay with these men out of fear that they couldn't find anyone else? Why is it so easy to leave once the weight is gone?
These women have not only gone and lost the weight, (which I think is fabulous) but then they have gone and grabbed a hold of new lifestyles.. Going out to the clubs, going out with their girlfriends, wearing clothes that they never would have before, and obviously they become completely different people. I've noticed the different personalities in them and it's not always for the best.
Confidence is one thing.....
As these women change, how could the marriage not?
I feel sorry for the men in these situations. They must feel like they've been hit by a train that they never saw coming. These men (the ones that I know) haven't changed. They're going about their lives the way they always have. All of the sudden their wives lose 30lbs (which I'm sure they're thrilled about too) but turn into different people with different attitudes and interests. Maybe that is the problem? Maybe these women expect that the men will change, and when they don't, they lose interest.
In my own head, once again, I'm just trying to figure out whats going on here. I'm sure that this could be a very controversial subject with many different opinions,,, but I want to hear them. I want to hear what you ladies think.
Why do so many (not all) women change so drastically after losing weight, and what makes them want a life overhaul?? Will they regret it, or are they just finally going after the life they've always wanted? Were they settling when they had the extra weight??
I know for me, when I lost my 40lbs after Lylah, it brought Peter and I closer. We have fun trying to eat healthy together. It also makes me so happy to know that he loved me no matter what. He loved me at my biggest and he loves me at my smallest. Sure I get some more looks now that I'm back to my normal size. Those looks can be great for the confidence levels, but not great enough to leave my husband who's been there and loves me no matter what.
I fear that these women are falling for the "grass is greener" theory. When they realize what they've lost along with the 20, 30, 40 + pounds, or when they get tired or their new "fit" friends, or running buddies, or maybe even when they gain the 20,30,40 pounds back, they're going to be surprised..
What do you guys think?? I'm sure if I've seen 3 marriages fail after the wife losing weight, you ladies have too... What are your opinions???